In memory of the late, great George Carlin, here’s some stuff in business that’s been going right up me of late:
- Blast email holiday cards. As a friend – let’s call him John, cuz that’s his name – said recently, if you have something to say, do so in a personal note. Getting your mass blanketed e-Thanksgiving card is not special, so kindly don’t bother.
- The ubiquitous saying, “That being said.” Why does it seem everyone is saying this now? Please state your case, throw in a “however” or an “and” or “although,” and leave this other utter nonsense out. Thanks.
- Shortening “Thanks.” Really? Is it that time consuming to type all six letters? People are so busy they just can’t quite commit to all those keys? Wow. Annoying. It’d be great if this went away. Thnx.
- Total strangers starting emails with, “I hope all is well.” Do you? Do you really? Well, all would be well if you’d take that meaningless pleasantry and toss it in the nearest well. Methinks it’d be much more genuine to open with, “I hope you’ll give me things.” #refreshing
- Seminars that speak of how to “survive and thrive.” No. Stop it. Can there be a tax on the use of this drivel? Someone sends an announcement on how to “survive and thrive” and we make ’em pay a tax or build a school or something? Please?
- And lastly, the forced shared bio. You know the guy you meet randomly who insists on telling you his entire work history? Ted Baxter babbling ad nauseam how “it all started in a 5,000 watt radio station in Fresno, CA” was brilliant comedy 40 years ago and yet this gas bag isn’t joking. Don’t care, pal. Don’t care.
That’s it, for now anyway. Surely there’s another corporate jamoke coming ’round the bend at any moment…
Can I add one? “Have a good one.” Have a good WHAT?! A good day, a good year, a good life?
Have a good reply to a web post, Laura. No, wait – a great one! Thank you!
Great and refreshing to hear… you forgot one other common term that has eeked its way into our vernacular: “at the end of the day…” Somehow I’ve picked up that horrible expression and I’d sure like to be more cognizant about before it leaps from my mouth.
Oh, I’m with you, Ken. I have to catch myself on this one as well. Not easy!
Your reply of “Give me things” made me do a spit take. Not a good idea with coffee. Not a smell you want stuck up there.
Here’s another one for you… people who constantly say fair or fair enough with a big fat question mark after each request. Hasn’t anyone ever told them life is not fair? Stop asking and trying to get us to agree with what you think is fair.
I’m guilty of that one, Karen. Whoops! Okay, here’s my commitment to stop saying that… fair?
Can I add one? Starting a sentence with “so…”.
I am an offender of using “that being said”. After reading your list, I realized I need to be more conscious of filler phrases and not using them.
We all have those, don’t we Jennifer? You see in the string my friend Laura who hates, “Have a good one.” I’ve caught myself saying it twice this afternoon, left to wonder who else it bothers! 🙂
Chris – Brilliant! What about people who start by saying, “Gotta minute?” That’s code for do you have time to hear my entire life story from infancy on up!
So true, Steve! I’ll pop by your office soon to share what I’ve been doing since the mid-80’s…
All of these great responses have made me feel truly “empowered.”
“Like” honestly “literally” not figuratively “empowered.”
Almost “like” Superman.
TNX Chris.
Eric
You are welx, E. 🙂
I am now paranoid to communicate with you in any way, haha! Kidding. Oops, hope I didn’t just remind you of another pet peeve! 😀
I too am paranoid, Linda! People have been sharing their lists over the past week and I must admit to my guilt using some trite expressions. Whoops! Can you say “New Year’s Resolution”? 🙂